Wednesday, December 02, 2009

What I want for Christmas

I don't believe in Christmas but for the sake of argument, I'm entitled to a wish list from Santa too.
1. No more public Christmas music starting after Thanksgiving.
I know this may make me highly unpopular, but no more Christmas music ever, if possible.
2. No more reality shows of any kind. If there is a God, It should ban them from the face of Earth. Total backlash.
3. A conviction of life in solitary confinement for the Salahis, preferably in Gitmo, with Christmas music blasting at all times.
4. An end to the new fashion of people dragging roller luggage all over the streets of Manhattan. Where's the airport, dudes?
5. My new HD flatscreen TV not to look slightly pixelated and everything yellow even if it's not a David Fincher movie (without me having to buy the right cable or a blueray whatever. Just by magic.)
6. The end of Dick Cheney (and Glenn Beck, and Sarah Palin and Fox News, and...).
7. The end of human stupidity.
8. A public option for universal healthcare in this country. Yeah, right.
9. Me on the US Supreme Court, replacing Judge Scalia. Fast tracked, no need for law school. I get to sit next to Sonia.
10. Peace on Earth.

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