Tuesday, February 14, 2006

It's The War vs Valentine's Day

Bill O'Reilly can hyperventilate about Xmas. I hate Valentine's Day. And always have. With or without a boyfriend, husband, lover or significant other, it's a pain in the ass. Yeah, so I'm a verbissener hater of completely manufactured holidays cynically designed to make you part with your hard earned cash for no discernible reason. So what?
But do I hate V-day more than Cinco de Mayo? Don't get me started. Or freaking St Patrick's day with the green beer and pasty drunks wearing vomit-green sweaters? I love it how gringos get plastered on 2 x1 frozen margaritas and eat unspeakably terrible "Mexican" food for a holiday that no one in Mexico gives a shit about. Well, okay, it's when we Mexicans celebrate the only battle we ever won against foreign invaders (the French, which actually makes it qualify as an international holiday). Let me disabuse you of this notion: Cinco de Mayo was created by some gringo to make people buy more nachos and salsas and beer and bad tequila that gives you evil hangovers. The actual Mexican version of the 4th of July happens September 15 and it's Independence Day. Get plastered on that day instead and confound the marketers. It's more fun that way.
The US is really good at exporting stupid, ugly holidays (Halloween, anyone?) to the rest of the world and then, as in Japan, they make the local version even worse (click on the dots).

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