Friday, April 28, 2006

O Jose Can't Chu Sí

For once, I'm siding with Bush. Of course the national anthem should be in English, like the national anthem of Turkmenbashi should be in Turkmenbashi. Why are journalists even asking this question? Have they no brains? Are they trying to incite racial divisiveness? Probably nobody really gives a fuck about the immigrants as long as they deliver dinner, but mess with the Star Spangled Banner and all hell breaks loose.
But what is more hideously offensive, what is grounds for death by firing squad is the version of the anthem itself (listen at your own peril). It is so utterly horrendous, so overproduced, so treacly, so disgusting, so vulgar, so shameless, so vomit inducing that I could feel a pustulent rash threatening to erupt on my skin just by listening to the first few bars. The clueless British producer Adam Kidron who came up with this stupid crap should be taken to Guantanamo and be forced to listen to his brainstorm in an neverending loop until he begs for mercy. Then some Reggaeton and the guy will wish he'd never been born.

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