Friday, June 01, 2007

Are all the Republicans...

...running for President? Seems like every Republican has decided that after the W.P.E (worst president ever), chances are that even if they fuck up big time, they're going to look good no matter what. Which is entirely true. A sanitary napkin would do a better job than the current POTUS.
Wikipedia, see link above, counts 10 guys in the running, not to mention those who are threatening, like Newt Gingrich and our very own Michael Bloomberg, who isn't really a Republican, as far as I'm concerned.
Not to be left behind, the Dems count 9 contenders, not to mention those potential candidates some people are inexplicably wishing for (like Al Gore*) and the guy who founded Tweezerman. Man, if the guy who founded Tweezerman runs, I'm voting for him. Thanks to him, there are now shocking pink tweezers and red tweezers and black tweezers and tweezers with the end this way or another, and none is cheaper than $10 bucks. I own a red pair and I have to say, they rule. The man took the cheapest, most pedestrian item in the world and packaged it into a beauty tool of desire. Imagine what he can do for the country!
And yet, as we survey those candidates with real chances, like Hillary, Barack and John Edwards, we are painfully aware and deathly afraid that the Dems are so spineless, gutless and cojonesless that they may lose. They may lose even as they are being handed the country on a silver platter. And then we'll have a president called Mitt, or even worse, one Rudy Giuliani, another bully.

*Michael Moore, the fat, unlikeable liberal documentarian, says that he wants Gore to run so he can get back the presidency they stole from him. To me, Gore is a fucking loser. He should have rioted and thrown the hissy fit to end all hissy fits when this happened and he just bent over with nary a fight. Why should he deserve to be president? He showed no leadership then and now of course it's easy for him to criticize Bush. Now. He should have been saying these things since at least two years ago. Sanctimonious loser.

No comments:

Post a Comment